Where are you living? Are you living in the truth? Or are we living from behind a wall? Afraid to allow people to really see us, afraid to let anyone past the barrier.
It's so easy to retreat behind this wall when we're hurting when fear raises it's ugly head once again when storm clouds gather. When dreams shatter or harsh words find our hearts like deadly arrows, knowing just where to hit to send us back into the safety of these walls. I think sometimes we don't even realize we are living here, or perhaps we've been here so long we no longer realize it. It's safer this way, you can't get hurt, buried deep behind these proverbial walls the world on one side and you on the other. But we were never meant to live like this.
The truth is the Devil wants you back there, he wants you hiding behind that wall in the illusion of safety. The Devil wants you enslaved to the pain and regrets because he knows as long as he keeps you where you are living behind the wall anguishing over old wounds that have festered in the darkness you are no threat.
We weren't meant to be a fortress, impenetrable- we were meant to live as a lighthouse. Living on a firm foundation, of knowing who's we are. Pointing other's to God as a beacon in the midst of the storm. Sometimes the greatest miracle, the biggest testament to God's power in your life is that the storm came and you are still standing. That you went through the wastelands in your life and came out on the other side.
We can pick where we live, we can stay in the dark building walls around our heart. We can keep living in pain we are trying so hard to hide from. We can keep refusing to let others in case they see what we are trying so desperately to hide. Or we can step out, we can choose to live, to tear down those walls and in its place build a lighthouse so that we can speak into the lives of others that are facing a storm. There is hope in this place, you are not alone, this pain you are feeling is not your breaking point, because He is using it for something great so keeping hanging on.
We can choose to say I may not understand this season of my life, I may not be able to see what is around the bend, what this painful place is creating. But I know who is already on the other side and has seen every step along this road. This place may be a surprise to me, but it isn't to Him. I can't see around the bend, but I am choosing to trust Him every step of the way. My bible says that He is working everything for my good, not something, not most things, everything. He has this. He will see me through this, and perhaps that was the whole point of this painful place. To teach me to point to Him even when I don't understand, even when I'm hurting, even when my life feels like a construction zone.
Where are you living? In pain? Or in the promise? In the painful broken place- or are you surrendering the walls and stepping out with hands lifted in surrender and pointing straight to Him?
Sometimes we get so comfortable living behind the wall, that it's scary to come out. It hurts, it's uncomfortable to let the mask we have clung to for so long fall away and let the world see us as we are, with all of cracks and breaks and bruised places. A living construction zone. It's hard to let the world see that we don't have it all together, it's almost written into our DNA. Don't let them see behind the curtain, the wall. I think we've come to believe that when we become Christians, it automatically means we have it all together, that it's going to be easy. But that's not true.
The testament isn't that we have it all together, but that He saw us through, that He has walked through all of this with you. The story isn't the mountain you are standing on, but who got you to the mountain. It isn't the valley your in, and you can't seem to find your way out of, but the one that is seeing you through. It isn't the fire you are in right now, but the one in the fire with you.
I really needed to read this today.
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